Every year, there are Hallmark Holidays that we embrace as opportunities to celebrate a role that someone in our lives has filled.  Sometimes, we fill that role.  Mother’s Day is one of those days.  It is always on the second Sunday in May.  The commercial industry promotes images of mothers doing all sorts of motherly things.  The images painted are of happily sacrificing women in the center of the family.  Nurturers.  Being appreciated and modestly accepting their due.

Many of the mothers who attend my sessions are experiencing ambivalent feelings, loss, self-love, and a more contemplative approach to this day.  They are mothers who have experienced closeness, distance, connection, disconnection, illness, death, and then moving on.  The coaching work involves exploring how to celebrate their roles as mothers on their own without external recognition.

Divorce, brain disorders (mental illnesses), death by suicide, and the more typical behaviors of adult children create a void which was once filled.  So, what solutions do I offer?

First, understand that coaching is a partnership and one that is filled with finding solutions together.  Second, I offer everyone the opportunity to mope and sulk because that can be freeing in and of itself.

Through the years, solutions include gardening, buying plants, volunteering, going out to eat with friends, camping, fishing, golfing, and other springtime activities.  Some go to the cemetery to visit their mothers.  Others celebrate by relishing a special dessert or treat previously shared.  Many couples acknowledge the day as one of recommitment to their relationship.

Over the course of time, things change.  Acknowledging the road as going from child to adult, single to mother, mother to crone or wise woman.  

Embrace Mother’s Day as a day to acknowledge connections throughout your lifespan, with different levels of engagement, and enjoy the journey.